Our day to day world is filled with conflict. Our media is filled with bad news, crises, battles, scary dark stuff- all filling us with fear. What do we do when we are afraid? Often, we are a bit more likely to feel like huddling in the darkness (if we don’t physically crawl into the closet and hide.) We have a tendency to hide, to pull back, to wish to numb ourselves. We chew our nails, wrinkle our brows, drink too much, eat food that is not nourishing. The modern world as presented to us in media is actually a world that promotes separation.
We hear so much about “them”… and who is Them? Them is other countries, other religions, other sides… those who are different in some small inconsequential way but none the less, we see them as different. We wish to cleave to our own kind, to really belong but what can that mean? We might need certain beliefs, the right clothes, possessions, degrees, bank balances, matching skin colors… and with all that, are we then okay, are we safe, do we fit? Do we then begin to live in peace and calmness and love. OR are we just then concerned if we will still belong if we lose those possessions, gain weight so those clothes don’t fit, lose our jobs to someone more qualified, or younger or willing to work for less.
The truth is, we are not all so different. In fact, we are not different at all. Our DNA with other humans is a match (or 99.5%, which seems quite close enough to me). We’re not far off from matching chimpanzees (96%). From the DNA perspective, we’re very much like our dog (82% match) or cat (90% match) and truthfully, we have an awful lot in common with bananas (60% match). Perhaps the answer to a peaceful world and a peaceful life isn’t in pointing out and dividing up the differences. The answer might just be is to embrace the other in wholeness.
Our challenges, stresses and pain in life are magnified as we identify more with the outside world and its perceived differences. My solution is to turn within. Meditation takes us within. WITHIN??? Like perhaps you’ve not pondered your “within” self but within you is something calm and wise. It is the energy, the essence that is the connection to all others. Regardless of your bank account, waist size, skin color, nationality or even your humanity or number of chromosomes… we all are the same. We all are connected. We all are part of a whole, a giant ball of love.
Whatever you wish to attain is life is fine. But if you haven’t attained it yet, life is still fine. You are only here to love. Your life purpose, your mission for being here is always rooted in love. Maybe the whole purpose of your being here was a kindness you showed to that old woman who got confused in the parking lot and couldn’t find her car. Or maybe your whole reason to live was to give a loving home to that stray dog. Maybe my whole reason for living my life was when I was 10 and heard my sister crying herself to sleep, I would go into her room at night and rub her back until she went to sleep. I didn’t solve her problem. I didn’t even know what her problem was. I had no model or life experience to resolve what makes a 6 year old cry in her bed at night. I just knew to rub her back. That was love.
So love is why we’re here. Love is where the answers are. And love my dears, lives within. Never without. All your answers, all your real needs, all your purpose, your solutions… you can find within.
How to go within? By stilling our mind and drawing our attention into this moment. Calm yourself with deep soothing breaths. Relax yourself by reassuring yourself that you are fine. Love yourself for the adorable weirdo that you are. Accept that this path in life is fine. If you wish to make readjustments, then seek how to do that within.
When you’re in doubt about what to do, do the loving thing. Especially do the loving thing for yourself. There is nothing to escape from, there is no test to pass, there is no standard to reach, there is no approval that will release you from pain and worry. You can release yourself from worry by accepting the life you have. You can stamp a big grade A on your forehead. You can escape into yourself for a few peaceful moments, breathe, smile then open your eyes and face the world again.
You and I are alike. Whether you think I’m amazing or whether you think I’m an asshole (and you would be right in either assessment) but we are alike. We are creative expressions of a wise, loving energy, our spiritual connective whole, that is beyond comprehension. We are called to be nice to one another, to help one another, to love one another. Whether black or white, American or Syrian, dog or banana… we’re called to love.
So if your life is confusing or painful, just love. If you feel lost and lonely, find a way to love. And if you think you’re not doing life right… you’re not enough, you’ve blown it. Just love yourself, it’s really okay.