The opinions of others often have little to do with who you truly are. However, if your shadow side is whispering too loudly into your self-perception, that opinion can deter from your best path.
It seems to me that when I am on the path to growth, awakening, enlightenment, being my best me… or whatever term you prefer, so many good things happen. One good thing is that my brightness, my positive strengths, my “powers for the good” become stronger, brighter and more effective. At the same time, it seems to me that the veil that can sometimes hide my shadow side from me grows thinner.
This greater awareness of the darker part of me is a good thing. It allows me to continue to work on the acceptance and incorporation of these aspects of myself into life. This action disempowers the shadows as something in me that I fear or am ashamed of. However, if I have fed my brighter side by denying the shadow side still lives, then this clearing of the veil can be upsetting or frustrating. If you cultivated a belief that your shadow side was gone… it can be a rude awakening when its presence makes itself known to you again.
Accept that you and all of life is dark and light, yin and yang. We can’t truly savor the good without a dose of the bad. We can’t strongly stand in our light unless we have spent a bit of time enmeshed with our shadow side.
My point? For me, when I suddenly become aware of my uglier side… I remember to smile and even mentally embrace those shadows. I show them to a seat at the “kid’s table”… that one off to the side of where the “grown ups” sit. There I can hear them and even acknowledge their input but from a bit of distance. Sort of pat them on the head and give them coloring books to quiet them while I get on with my business of being the light.